Stop the Inanity! Bob Sansevere on KSTP

Bob Sansevere, who usually spends his time being a lousy sports writer, does commentary on KSTP news. You can read and see his latest commentary on crime in the Twin Cities here. What sort of insights does Sansevere bring us? What incisive commentary might Sansevere be able to provide?

It's simple: more needs to be done to stop crime!

What needs to be done? Sansevere doesn't say. How can we do it? Sansevere doesn't say. All he really tells us is that

"What you need - what we all need - is a commitment by politicians and community leaders to find ways and to make laws that reduce crime."

Hmm. Intriguing ideas. We need to find ways to reduce crime. We need "a commitment by politicians and community leaders" to to so. We need "laws."

What should these laws be? What are these ways?

Don't ask Bob Sansevere: he's just here to give us empty rants about crime.

Evidently, something is being done: Sansevere points out that crime has been reduced by 15 percent in Hennepin county and 12 percent in Minneapolis. Still, Sansevere has to go on a cliched rant because "there's still way too many crimes being committed" and "There are plenty more examples of crimes and criminal behavior just this month alone." When will something be done? Something must be done soon! Why won't our politicians and community leaders make the commitment? Why won't we make laws to reduce crime?

You could pretty much take this commentary, revise the details, and put it on any local news broadcast in any market in the last 30 years, and it would pretty much work. There's nothing insightful, instructive, or useful in this rant. CRIME IS BAD! WE HAVE TO STOP CRIME! Good, good. I hope, though, that the next time KSTP decides to put somebody on TV to do a commentary about crime, that person might have, you know, AN INTELLIGENT, CONCRETE PROPOSAL TO TRY DEAL WITH CRIME AS OPPOSED TO A HOLLOW SCREED ABOUT HOW CRIME IS BAD AND WE HAVE TO DO MORE TO REDUCE IT.

Bob Sansevere offers us nothing. Which, you know, makes him pretty much perfect for local broadcast news.

No mixed feelings: music on public radio makes me bored

I listen to public radio in the car because I find most music boring and I'd rather listen to people talk. I can listen to sports radio hosts blather and bluster, I can choose partisan political ranting, or I can listen to intelligent people explore various interesting and pertinent issues. I usually choose public radio.

There are many, many, many options for music across the radio dial; if people are interested in music, I mean, it's right there.

So when NPR or MPR does a feature on music, I think, "Why?" I've clearly chosen 91.1 because I'm not interested in listening to or thinking about music. I want discussion on socially relevant issues, politics, world events, science, and the minutiae of contemporary life. If I wanted to listen to music, I could do so without much difficulty.

Public radio is what people listen to when they want to get away from pointless music, so why does public radio insist on including pointless music within its programming?

Here's what it's like. Let's say there's a mall, and in this mall are dozens and dozens of coffee shops. There are all different kinds of coffee shops for anybody who wants coffee. And let's say there's just one tea shop in the entire mall. It's not as busy as some of the coffee shops, but people who don't want coffee but have to spend time in the mall, or people who really like tea, or people who just want a little variety, can always go there. Now let's say every so often, perhaps once a month, perhaps every day for one hour, this one tea shop didn't serve tea. Let's say periodically, this tea shop served coffee, and if people came in to order tea, they were turned down and offered coffee instead. In a mall filled with coffee shops, the one tea shop decides occasionally to only serve coffee. That's what it's like when NPR or MPR do music features.

It's degenerate shopper week

If you're standing in line at 6:00 a.m. to get into a store to get good deals, you are a degenerate shopper. As a blog devoted (partly) to frugality, we support degenerate shoppers that would get up to shop the Friday after Thanksgiving just to get spectacular deals. Indeed, two of our contributors (Cruelty-Free Mommy and Partly Cloudy and Pleasant) will be joining my grandmother and the original degenerate shopper, my mother, on Friday morning, standing in the cold and bustling through crowds for the sake of cheapness.

And while I, Pacifist Viking, am the most widely renowned cheapskate on the block, I will be happily sleeping while these festivities occur (well, perhaps I shouldn't assume happy sleeping. What about nightmares? It could be decidedly unhappy sleeping). Is that a threat to my cheapness cred? Perhaps. Buying season tickets for the Vikings probably already destroyed whatever frugality credibility I had, though (in my defense, they are really, really cheap tickets).

So I salute you, Mom, Grandma, Cruelty-Free Mommy, Partly Cloudy and Pleasant, and all the other degenerates that will be getting up in the dark Friday morning. Buy yourselves some iced lattes. You're getting up before dawn for the sake of cheapness: you've earned that expensive cold coffee.

Cheapskate Nightmare: Ruining Pants

I have, really, four pairs of pants I can wear to work. Two others can work, but I hate them for various reasons.

So four pairs of pants. That's all I really need.

But last Friday I got sick all over one pair, and couldn't stomach keeping them. Down to three pairs. Then yesterday I ripped another pair against a small nail sticking out of a couch. Now we're down to two good pairs of pants.

What's a cheapskate to do? Buy new pants?

No, screw that. Since I only work three days a week, I can double up one pair for the week easily. Sure, Kohl's always has cheap pants, but who wants to spend money on pants? As great philosopher Homer Simpson said, "Don't you hate pants?" I hate pants. And I'm not buying more.

This is part of the cheapskate's code: don't buy pants.

Minnesota Sports

If any of you rubes who frequent this blog follow Minnesota sports, you may wish to check out my sports blog, Sports Toothache. There we write about sports in general, with a great deal of our focus on the Minnesota Vikings. It's the blog I actually work hard at.

My Greatest Athletic Accomplishment

I used to have a bad habit, and a particularly bad habit for a frugal person. I used to love playing the crane game. Anytime I was near a crane game, if I had a dollar, I was playing it. I was actually pretty good at it, but eventually I realized I was in the process of winning a bunch of stuffed animals that I didn't want at all. I would spend fifty cents winning a prize that I wouldn't pay fifty cents for if I saw it in a store. That's senseless.

But the crane game is also where I had my greatest athletic achievement. I once put a dollar in for two drops of the crane...

And won three animals.

I won three stuffed animals on two drops of the crane.

Think about that. Do you think anybody in the world has ever topped that? With that loose crane, it's difficult enough to go two for two on a dollar. But I got one animal on one of my tries, and two animals on the other try.

That's why, years later, I still remember that. And that's also why I'm a pathetic loser, since that is, indeed, my greatest athletic accomplishment.

But seriously, three animals on two tries? That's unheard of. I'm not sure I've ever seen anybody get two animals on two tries, or three animals on three tries, but I did three in two.

Popsicles!

Popsicles are the best. Sugared ice, on a stick, for a few cents. That's a nice frugal snack, and they're pretty low calorie too. It feels good eating them, summer or winter. We here at WHMFASS enthusiastically endorse the eating of popsicles.

(Welcome to the latest effort to turn this blog into outright irrelevance).

Replacing _ucking Perkins

We're still outraged over Perkins' decision to eliminate the bread bowls from the salad, leaving them just salads (somehow, the fact that they left the prices the same doesn't surprise us and doesn't bother us, since we're not going there anymore anyway--as vegetarians, we're not paying $8+ for iceberg lettuce, cheese, and dressing). We're even considering getting a piece of paper, an envelope, and a stamp, and sending them a real letter.

But _ucking Perkins is now dead to us, and this is the last time we visit the cemetery. As George Costanza attempting to set up a date with Marissa Tomei for after Susan's funeral, we must move on.

And for now, we move on with Quiznos.

Quiznos has a veggie sandwich, and if you order a regular sized veggie sandwish, you can also get a cup of broccoli cheese soup and a pop for like eight dollars. Now, of course we're a site devoted to frugality, and eight bucks may be a bit much for a sandwich, soup, and pop. But it's really, really good. And since the thing I'll miss most about that restaurant which shall not be named is the Honey Mustard dressing, I appreciate that Quiznos provides dressing--including Honey Mustard--that you can dip the sandwich in.

Deals?

This months Minneapolis St. Paul Magazine cover story is "Great Stuff Cheap". I am always a bargain hunter so I picked it up. Well after spending $4 for the magazine, I was disappointed to realize that this magazine's idea of a bargain is not the same as mine...
For example in the food section it portrayed a $12 hamburger.
It was still fun to look at all of the stuff I am not going to buy, I guess...